Casualties of Love: The Long Island Lolita Story

Jenni and I both saw this movie when it originally aired on tv and here we are, 21 years later (eeeek), watching it again! This movie is famous because it’s the movie that tells things from Joey’s point of view. The one with Drew Barrymore is the one that was based more actual facts. This movie infuriated me when I was 14 so I can’t even imagine how I’m going to feel after 20 more years of feminism under my belt.

Casualties of Love
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The Girl He Met Online.

The Girl He Met Online.

The Girl He Met Online.

The tagline for this movie is “A man’s relationship with a bipolar woman becomes dangerous.” So short, so simple, so great. I was ready for this immediately. Unfortunately I dvred this over a month ago to watch with my sister but then she decided to move away from NYC and we got busy doing things like packing all of her worldly possessions into a truck and this took a backseat. It was sadder for me than it was for her I think.
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Lizzie Borden Took an Ax.

Lizzie Borden took an ax and gave her mother forty whacks. When she saw what she had done she gave her father forty one.

Why is that a thing we repeated as kids?? I remember it being chanted while jumping rope! It’s so creepy. I was older when I realized that she was a real person and not just a weird childhood murderous tale from the sea*. In high school I was obsessed with serial killers and criminals in general though so I doubt everyone was reading up on Lizzie Borden at the public library like I was.

Lizzie Borden

Basically Lizzie Borden seemingly horrifically killed her parents with an ax but this was back in the day when people thought women were too frou-frou and delicate to do something gruesome so no one believed it.
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Flowers in the Attic.

IT’S HERE! FLOWERS IN THE ATTIC DAY IS HERE! I had plans to watch this with my friend but somehow she slept through it and here I am watching it three days later. What a traitor I am to my generation.

I only ever read the first of these books, which my dad’s wife at the time was reading and told me I’d like. First of all, why would someone give these books to a kid?? Secondly, why did all my friends get these books from their moms and step moms?!? It was apparently an epidemic if you ask women from their late 20s to early 40s. These books are so creepy and horrible. Definitely too much for 12/13 year old me to handle, which is why I never kept reading. I just shudder when I see the horrible cover art- gives me the heeby jeebies.

Case in point.
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Hitched for the Holidays.

Hitched for the Holidays.

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Don’t you just love the holidays? I love when Lifetime and ABC Family and Hallmark all start playing their holiday movies and half of them are about ladies who are frantically and horribly single but find love through the magic of Christmas. The other half are a hodge podge of crap about kids and families, bo-ring! I prefer to focus on the former.
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You Belong to Me.

Kat has finally settled into her new apartment in Harlem so Brandon and I came over to do what all good friends do- watch a terrible movie and drink all of her booze. We are the best!

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The movie we kind of decided on is “You Belong to Me” starring Shannon Elizabeth so you know the acting is going to be tops and there is a supernatural element so you also know I was sold immediately. At first I thought it was based on a Christopher Pike book and got really excited but Kat reminded me that that would be “Remember Me.” Now I want to read my old Christopher Pike books.
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Betrayed at 17.

Exciting! From the commercial this movie looks like a Lifetime classic. A movie about something moms have heard about in magazines and some local newscast and have freaked out about and so a movie is made showing the absolutely worst thing that could happen to freak those moms out even more. She’s Too Young, about teenage party sex, is great example of an earlier Lifetime movie in the same vein, or so I hope. (speaking of which, I hope they re-air that gem soon.)
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